sinking...

im sinkin into depression i think...

felt so fucked since morning...

was nt a fantastic day to start with anyway...



had a fucked up dream...

dreamt tat my mom turned into a monster and i had to decapitate her to take her down...



then u spilled some cereal on my top without realizing it until i got to my office...

tried so hard but just couldnt remove the stain...


suddenly felt lost and confused as i was walkin to the bus stop...

began to doubt my interest in this field and the goal in my life...

began to doubt who i love and who really loves me...



had a fight with alicia again when i got to my office...

thus unable to focus on my work...



been drifting in n out of my daziness since morning...

dunno wat to do... dunno wat can i do... dunno what should i do...



meaning of life began to blur...

what am i doin here...

felt so lost...

felt so sick...



life has not meaning to me...

who am i living my life for...?

myself...? my family...? my loved ones...? my friends...?

i dunno...



so many things in my heart i wanna say...

but dunno how to pen it down...

dunno who to tok to...


so many things i wanna do...

but beyond my means...

beyond my time...



so many things i wanna achieve...

but beyond my capability...

beyond my dreams...



life sucks...

i would die with no regrets if i have to die now...